Together and Alone
I have a fitting excuse for publishing this piece late. I fell asleep talking to the only person I never feel alone with.
Everywhere I’ve been, I’ve met people who feel alone. Rich people, sad people, men, women and even children too. I’ve been to over 15 countries and had conversations in at least 4 languages. Strangers on planes, hostel roommates, and colleagues I’ve worked with have all told me the same thing “Sometimes, I feel so alone.”
The first time I learned this was in the back seat of an unassuming Uber. I’d been hanging out with a popular girl in the neighborhood, smoking weed. As we pulled up to her house, she turned to me in half-whisper and said “I’m so happy we hung out, I’ve been so lonely.”
I went to Italy shortly after. After a bottle or two of lip-smacking Syrah, a stranger I met told me about his girlfriend. She cheated on him but claimed she was raped. My heart hurt, and then I realized why. As he was telling me about heartbreak, it reminded me of my own. We suffered in different ways, but we ended up the same. Hurt and on our own again.
I got a ticket to Tony Robbins in London. I thought he’d set my life straight. He put 12,000 souls in a room in and asked “raise your hands if you feel alone.” I lowered my eyes and raised mine. When I looked up, hundreds, maybe thousands of people had their hands up with me.
Last summer, I walked into a club to meet a colleague. He's the CEO of a powerful organization; probably worth billions. He sat at the bar with 3 others on his right. They were making out, touching each other. He twiddled on his phone. My colleague was paying for everyone's drinks and no one drank with him. He partied alone.
This weekend, I hung out with an old friend. He told me about his business and all the things he had done in a year. When he thought no one was around, my friend turned to me and asked "Can we hug?". I've known him for a while, and I've also known that all he does, he does to find comfort and love.
Sometimes, I get the urge to ask strangers "Do you know that we feel the same?” We've all had grief, cried of joy and been alone. We've been lost, we’ve danced with others, and one day, we all won't be. Do you know that we all feel alone?
If this piece made you feel something, let me know. Click the heart or drop a comment - thank you ❤️
You go right to the heart of things Yehudis. Yes, I know this feeling. And funny how knowing you feel this way along with everyone else makes me feel less alone.
I'm glad there's someone like that for you. I'm afraid the only being I never feel alone with is my cat Walpole.